Gone.

Well, it is gone.

The last job that i applied for in pensacola a week ago today has been removed from indeed. I can't look at it or see it anymore, last night the website where all of my info is started glitching and now i can't even look to see if they have "candidate not selected" by my name. I may never know when that Job was filled or if they actually were anywhere close to calling me but i just want to continue to trust God with this Job....yeah the one that may already be filled. God has asked that i trust him by not trying to look at the Job posting, and I'm completely fine with that....because once i see that they did actually pick someone else my hope will be completely gone. I want to do this the right way, i don't want this career to become an idol, or something i can't stop thinking about moment by moment. being sick the last few days really was a good thing, as i spent a lot less time worrying and a lot more time resting and reading. God may have just given me hope to bring me back to him and thats worth it. As much as i want this Job i want him more. as many moments as i spent in prayer over this Job were moments that i may not have spent with him.

Im very discouraged at not hearing yet, but the day isn't over and the world isn't going to fall apart because i am not getting my way again. I want to get Gods way anyhow, not my own. It is just hard when i thought what i was pursuing was his way.

anyway,

Thats all i have for now...

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